Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American dream?

Go ahead and play the blues if it makes you happy.

I can't believe it! Reading and writing actually paid off.

Here's to alcohol; the source of, and answer to, all of life's problems.

When will I learn? The answer to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV.

Operator! Give me the number for 911.

The strong must protect the sweet.

Kids, you've tried your best and you've failed miserably. The lesson is, never try.

What's the point of going out? We're just going to end up here again.

I want to share something with you: three little sentences that'll get you through with life. 1. Cover for me. 2. Oh, good idea, boss. 3. It was like this when I got here.

To start, press any key. Where's the any key?

Stupider like a fox.

Red M&M, blue M&M, they all come out the same color in the end.