I have my standards. They may be low, but I have them.

I didn’t belong as a kid, and that always bothered me. If only I’d known that one day my differences would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier.

I never know how much of what I say is true.

My whole life had been spent waiting for an epiphany, a manifestation of God's presence, the kind of transcendent, magical experience that lets you see your place in the big picture. And that is what I had with my first compost heap.

We're all divine, but I was the only one who had the nerve to call myself that. And I thought of it first. So there!

I'm pretty gutsy, but I'm intimidated by tremendous accomplishment... and by people who are very tall.

I married a saint and gave birth to an angel.

If only I'd known that one day my differentness would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier.

If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?

I'm everything you were afraid you little girl would grow up to be and your little boy.

I'm an entertainer. For a long time, I'd say I was an actor. Then, when I couldn't get a job acting, I said I was a singer. But basically, I take what comes my way and make some work of my own. And fortunately, I'm still having fun with it. ~ USA Today, 10/17/03

I'm working my way toward divinity.

In Hawaii I was the chief chunker in a pineapple canning factor. I used to come home smelling like a compote.